You want answers, and you shall have them.

Nope. We used to be bigger, but now this is a freelance operation, operated by an army of one. I only have so many hours in the week.
On the internet, from the couch, the office, the kitchen counter, wherever I can access power, music, coffee, and my sketchbook.
That's probably the most important question you could ask. It’s a two-way street isn’t it? Nothing is worse than getting into a relationship, and finding out you want different things. We favor clear objectives, believe the user is the most important person in the mix, and want things to be functional and awesome looking at the same time. We aren't interested in startup projects that aren't funded, or solve real issues for real people (dating app? forget it). We don't want to help with pay-per-click advertising on your link farm site about erectile dysfunction. And it goes without saying we reserve the right to not work with folks we fundamentally disagree with on a moral or philosophical level. But hey, that's not you. We can already tell you are dope. You have good taste in music. You root for the underdog, read poetry and can cook lasagne from scratch. You're already our favorite person in the world. Let's do it!
Yes, but do to our current workload and time availability, we can't do full scale, custom development at this time. We like Wordpress a lot, but we can plan and develop just about anything - unless it was built on Geocities back in ’98. (This memory gets us misty and nostalgic for the way things were.) If you need something big and awesome, and need a recommend, I do work for a full service agency during the day, and would be happy to introduce you to the team, and see if it's something we can help with.
Nah. I have people I can recommend however. HOLLER.
Startups with money? Yes. However if you have money then you probably aren’t a startup anymore. We consider a “startup” to be an temporary organization for testing ideas in order to find a profit model that works. We do like the folks that hustle, are creative, hungry, and have weird nutty ideas with a crazy fearlessness in their eyes. We like to meet them, have drinks, swap stories and knowledge. But we don’t work for free, or for “profit sharing” if you are right out of the gate and don’t have a repeatable revenue generator already cranking out the cheddar and dead presidents.

I'm not able to take on pro bono work right now. If I'm going to be on a computer screen at night burning the candles, I need to be making $$$ to feed my kids and buy their shoes. You know how it is. THEY ARE GROWING BEASTS.
Maybe. Wait... define “brand”? Entrepreneurs and marketing gurus might tell you it’s the only game in town. They are only right if you drink marketing kool-aid all day long. Do you have a soul? Do you want to spend your life posting selfies all day just to get clicks? We say fuck that noise. Generally speaking, we like Seth Godin’s definition of brand:
A brand is the set of expectations, memories, stories and relationships that, taken together, account for a consumer's decision to choose one product or service over another.
We believe in authenticity, and in doing the thing that is most true to who you are. Can you make a brand out of your own authenticity?
No. But I will audit your existing app or website for UX/UI improvements and recommendations. I'm super good that. At night I prefer to focus on identity design and brand consulting.
So many things. I'm a lover, fighter, poet, comedian, musician, artist, parent, whiskey drinker, crappy skater, believer and doubter. Collectively I make one hell of a human being.